★★★★★
“To live a good life: We have the potential for it. If we can learn to be indifferent to what makes no difference. This is how we learn: by looking at each thing, both the parts and the whole. Keeping in mind that none of them can dictate how we perceive it. They don’t impose themselves on us. They hover before us, unmoving. It is we who generate the judgments—inscribing” - Aurelius
This book had a profound impact on me, serving as my introduction to stoicism (whilst I was aware and skeptical all of the criticism surrounding it). My view on this, is similar to how I view all books, that there’s always something of value and something to learn beyond the criticism. Whatever you may think of the stoic philosophers and their teachings, if you isolate the ideas (from the delivery and from the context), they still make sense and are applicable or useful. Ofcourse the context matters, but the ideas here transcend if you stay open enough to them.
If you feel that being stoic makes you less competitive, then pair this with Machiavelli’s Prince or the 48 Laws of Power.
The main themes in the book are clear. While we may encounter malevolence or negativity from others, Aurelius teaches us to recognize that such behavior is a reflection of their own struggles, not ours. By cultivating detachment and not allowing their actions to affect us, we can navigate life with a sense of tranquility and maintain a strong moral compass. Effectively, don’t try to impress and marry your identity towards what other people think. In fact, don’t care at all. Basic principle.
Ultimately, external circumstances are beyond our control, and that the only thing we can control is our own response to them. Whether we encounter praise or criticism, success or failure, we have to remain grounded and unaffected, neither seeking validation nor becoming embittered by the opinions of others. This is not to say that we should be apathetic, but rather that we should focus our energies on the things that we can control, such as our own thoughts and actions, rather than becoming consumed by the opinions of others.
No matter how losing your position, you must still make the best possible move on the chess board. The only thing you have control over is your mind, you can’t control other people, your family members, the weather, or even your health in certain cases - so control your mind whilst you still have the ability to do so (that’s your best friend). That’s a neat summary of the rest of the book.
I think the following summary and analysis of the book is great:
Otherwise, please see my key highlights below.